I’ve been thinking a lot about the hurt people do recently. I’m having to come to terms with the fact that one particular situation will never be resolved with any sense of satisfaction. Maybe I am really old fashioned but I have a really strong belief in common human decency , it’s a constant source of amazement to me how few people seem to share that belief.
I’ve never been someone to bury my head in the sand about anything and the thought that I had caused anyone any pain, either through my actions or inactions would haunt me forever. True, I have defended myself when I’ve been attacked, the problem with that being that I am a lot better at expressing myself visually and in words than anyone who has tried to cause me harm, I have feelings the same as everyone else and I feel hurt deeply. It must be terribly freeing I guess…. to be able to shed any feelings of conscience or remorse and just walk away from the carnage of your actions. To become distracted and waltz away from the suffering you left behind you. It must be even more freeing to be able to lie or conveniently edit the truth until an entirely different version of events than the actuality takes shape. You can put it about that someone has gone mad, you can find people with cliched axes to grind and wedge in versions of situations to create a tailored response. You can find people whose perspectives of the world are so deranged that they will propagate a certain truth. The real gift, of course, is to take things that one step further until you can recount that version with utter conviction, until you almost start to believe it yourself.
I guess that is how politicians sleep at nights, the constant repetition of a bare faced lie until it is a new truth. You can’t even call someone a liar in the Houses of Parliament, you can consign a generation to the scrap heap, tear down the national health service, conduct an illegal war and kills countless people, but a liar? No! You can suggest that someone is being a touch disingenuous, maybe even that they are being economical with the truth at a push, but lying? That gets you thrown out of the chambers and blackballed from all the best clubs.
So how does an honest person cope in a world like this? Where fairness, justice, honesty and decency are just words. Where your morality is dictated not by an inner code but by the company with which you choose to associate. Am I really old fashioned? Possibly. Am I incredibly naive? Perhaps? Can I sleep at nights? Definitely! I guess that is something at least.