My mum will have to clear that up.

I have a very distinct memory from my early twenties that as I listened to some acquaintance tell yet another ‘hilarious’story of his drunken exploits and about how he ended up pissing all over the bathroom floor in some pub or other, a mutual friend, on hearing this, twisted his face in disgust and said, “somebody’s mum will have to clear that up” and in another pub it would have been his mum doing the cleaning because that’s what she was, a cleaning lady. I was thinking about this a couple of years back when a bunch of local arseholes decided to be all anti establishment by riding around the local branch of McDonalds on their bikes. They were on film, laughing and congratulating themselves at their daring. All I could think was that some poor sod would have to mop the floor yet again and waste an hour of their time filling in an incident report, someone on minimum wage, not some bored, middle aged, middle class person on their fairy light covered bicycle.

I thought much the same today as I saw poster after poster of the local mp with some meaningless slogan and a bit of the organisation posting it’s branding stuck to bus shelter after bus shelter. Quite what it was supposed to say or achieve is totally lost on me other than that they have plenty of money to waste on full colour printing and stickers. I looked at them as I walked along, they said and achieved precisely nothing and all I could think was “someone on minimum wage will have to clean that mess up.” It won’t be their mummies and daddies though, the ones who do do working class jobs amongst them do them as some sort of political affectation, taking money from the less qualified who would only be able to do that sort of thing. None of them are the sort that will have to do shitty jobs just to survive, just because it looks a bit ‘street’ or because they can’t be arsed to do anything with more responsibility.

I do wonder what they were trying to achieve…. How that one of the many pointless excercises in windbaggery played out… I hope they had really good biscuits that day whilst deciding to bring down the government by getting cleaning staff on minimum wage to use their last bit of elbow grease trying to shift some meaningless posters for them after their little bit of fun.

I often wonder whether these arsehats are actually paid by the Tories in the first place, I mean, how better to make the left wing look bad than by making them all out to be a bunch of stupid, thoughtless, fools than by making a run down area look just that little bit grottier? 

I also wonder if they have an active interest in keep the Tories in power…. I mean what use could they possibly have if labour got in with Jeremy Corbyn in charge? No marches to be had, no fundraisers, no more meetings and stupid little splinter groups, heaven knows they might actually have to do something constructive with their lives…. Actually have one would be a start. Oh well, at the rate things are going they can keep themselves knee deep in eighties stencils and silly placards for decades to come. Maybe that is why they do their very best to to make the left wing look shit? I mean, what better way to stop people voting labour than by giving the impression that all the left wing ever does is to vandalise things and make a bloody nuisance of themselves. 

Oh well, Freedom for Tooting and all that! 


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