Wasn’t me guv! Honest!

firestarterWell… it was… sort of…

Every now and then I seem to suffer from a form of visual tourettes… A little idea pops into my head that is so awful that I would be really dumb to even put it on paper. So, of course, I go straight out and do it. That said, this wasn’t my idea, it came from a conversation between two un-named friends at my birthday dinner this year. Once said, I had to do it. I expect I will get into a bit of trouble with this one but, hey ho, that happens sometimes. The really interesting question, to my mind, is why? So what have we got? A Keith Flint Dweebling in the clothes from the Firestarter video with the rest of the Prodigy lurking on the periphery in Bottle Alley with Hastings pier burning in the background. Keith is holding a lighted match and there is a jerry can full of petrol to hand. O.k… Yes! it does look bad doesn’t is? But hang on a minute! Scroll down on this blog many posts back and you should find one of my stuff in the Save Hastings Pier shop with the fabulous Dave Francis, the then proprietor. At that point, the pier was a totally charcoal free structure and yet it quite clearly needed saving, stuck as it was in the grasp of some shady Panamanian holding company whilst it rotted away uncared for. The sad thing is, most people didn’t give a toss, in fact the only time said toss was given was when some nasty little sods burnt it down. It was only then that the public were upset. I remember that day vividly, the acrid smoke hanging over the town, the road being blocked off, everyone (including myself) turning up to watch it burn in horror and disbelief. It seemed only then did people actually pull their fingers out of their collective bottoms and actually start to really do something to save the thing. Personally, I think the new design is shit! Typical committee led mediocrity that looks great in swish artist’s renderings but totally lacks the majestical grotesquery of a pier that grew and mutated as needs required that the original had. Plus I like mine better! Everyone needs a pier with a great big Gnome on it!

The Dweebling's design for hastings pier.

The Dweebling’s design for hastings pier.

Are you still angry? You are? Good! Now look again at that picture, where is Keith Dweebling standing? That’s right! Bottle Alley. The original Sidney (King of Concrete) Little double decker promenade which is now starting to fall to bits as the pier had done before it. I understand that right now a preservation society is in the process of stopping this iconic walkway from falling apart, but that will cost money and political willpower from the local authorities. Wether they will get either is yet to be seen. Let’s just hope it gets done while the thing is still in one piece. A public outcry would help but unfortunately concrete doesn’t burn so easily does it?

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